Judgement Day

Well... I have pondered this for a while now... and I have decided not to confront the ex-in-laws. You see, Rebel's patriarchal grandunits have decided that I am no longer welcome at family functions. Good!! I don't enjoy going to the "Once Annual Dinner" anyways. I go because Rebel does not want to go alone, and I take a friend every year because I don't want to sit alone whilst Rebel mixes and mingles with kinfolk I really have no interest in.

But this issue is really twofold::
1) they judged me , and 2) they made Rebel the emissary instead of having the decency to tell me themselves that I was "persona non grata". What bothers me most is that I raised my child to do exactly the opposite of what they have done... passed judgment. I want Rebel to accept people as they are and expect the same acceptance from them, regardless of the issue. I also taught to never shame another. The love Rebel has for them kept mum anything that might have been said to them about them using their grandchild as a tool for their passing of judgment. Rebel was ashamed of their behaviour... I am older and understand how they could do this. But, as Rebel seems to be handling it well now, I will leave it alone for the time being. Should it begin to eat away at him somehow, I will then let them know exactly what I think of it all.

To take the word of someone that saw me for a few minutes once over the last Yuletide without ever actually talking to me about it... I find this all rather sad more than anything. That is not how I brought up my child, and I would have thought better of them as people. Funny... find out you don't really know inlaws after all... I'd have thought they'd have verified random comments before banishing me. Maybe I am just not to be tolerated now that the cherished grandchild is almost of age & all that?

However, on the plus side, I find it gratifying that Rebel did not feel a need to explain my situation, defend my actions, straighten them out, etc. I am a firm believer in letting others do as they will... it is not up to us to force others to see the light. Because, deep down, I think if they really wanted to KNOW the circumstances behind what was said by the person passing on misinformation, they would have asked me directly.

And so it goes.....
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