happiness?

Well, I picked up a sticker that said "If money were no object, what would you be doing with your life today?" When I mentioned it to someone I count as important, they said "Exactly what I am doing right now." I concurred that I, too, like my life today. If I were to win the lottery, I would not quit my job. I would like to take off work at 2pm, just to give myself a few more hours a day to do some more of the things I like, tho :-). Read, carouse bookstores. Take an art class. Meet friends for an early dinner or coffee. Open mike night at a local poetry reading. I would like to write more, maybe even for someone else to read? Not really sure about that yet. So much of myself comes through in what I write. Anyway, back to the original intent here (I DO tend to meander) ... this person thinks that I am unhappy...that I am presenting a facade of happiness but that underneath I am unhappy and possibly even scared? Well, I took that home and chewed on it for a bit. And yes, I do have to admit some apprehension... don't we all, if honest about it? Life has no guarantee with it, no master plan, no tour guide as to how it is best lived. This "seat-of-my-pants type of gig gets a bit scary at times. Never being in love again scares me. Being in love scares me. Getting my heart broken again and maybe not being able to put all the pieces back together again the next time scares me. Which of those scares me more? Not sure.... But am I unhappy? No, I don't think so. Stay tuned...